Pehchan ~ Episode 6 Review

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Prevarications, evasions, sidesteps – not quite lies but not the truth either. All those little bharams we keep. Sweet little lies we tell to cover unpleasant realities. Facades we build to create illusions of happiness. Like filmy cobwebs floating gently in the air, these silken webs of deceit rarely if ever make their presence felt. There but not quite. So intricately are these woven into our social fabric that before we know it the seemingly harmless half-truths begin to live a  life all their own. Illusions no longer they they are now hard-core  realities. To deny them would be akin to denying our own sense of self. From here begins a vicious cycle of preserving and perpetuating the status quo. Yesterday’s victims are today’s victimizers.

p12The past is reworked and retold as a story of triumph and success. Mansoor ke abba bohot hi social qisam ke aadmi the… bohot hi heartthrob qisam ke aadmi the… meri saheliyan mujh se bohot hi impress theen… susral walon ki larkiyan tau jal jal kar khaak ho jati theen… 

Laila’s mother-in-law spins quite the yarn: glamorous parties, thrilling car-races, memorable paan runs with friends, what a picture she paints of the past! Behind that glitz though is a hard to forgot story of pain, suffering and humiliation: sirf handsome aur khush shakal honay se kiya hota hai beta… a momentary slip but a telling one. This mother is no idiot. Like father like son. Mansoor tau bilkul apney baap par gaya hai. She is fully aware of her son’s philandering. But is awareness enough? Rather than confronting her son and laying down the law, it is to Laila she turns and offers her sage advice: beta chaaron qul parh ke na apney upar phoonk liya karo… 

The mantle has been passed. The khandaan ki izzat is now in the hands of the next generation.  p3This is now Laila’s burden to bear, her duty as this barey khandaan ki bahu to maintain the status quo.  A seemingly straightforward story of love and betrayal Bee Gul and Khalid Ahmad’s Pehchan is a brilliantly done, subtle yet scathing critique of a social set-up that prides itself on preserving and perpetuating ossified cultural traditions. That a living breathing young girl is being systematically raped – first her dreams crushed, then her body violated, and now her trust shattered – is not worrisome to those around her. They are too busy congratulating themselves on their suljha hua damaad and sajti hui bahu. Where does Laila the individual fit into this grand scheme of making the right social connections? Who is Laila to turn to?

Her parents want and expect a smiling sab theek hai p2report from her, her husband expects her to be around and willing to serve his needs as and when it pleases him, her saas sees nothing new in Laila’s situation (she went through it and not only survived but thrived), and her friends tareef the handsome and mature Mansoor bhai. Much like those delicate roses that fell from Laila’s hands and got scattered all over the snow covered steps, her life too seems to have slipped away from her hands and shattered in to thousands of fragments. She can apologize a million times for uncommitted transgressions, starve herself silly, shed innumerable tears, but ultimately to what end? How much does a shattered life matter to a people who pride themselves on preserving puraney magar mehnge baahar se aaney waley bartan? 

Laila is not the only one hurting. p10Nor is she the only one struggling to maintain a front. Much like Laila who cannot help but twitch when her dad brings up the sab jhooti khabrein, Kuku too is hard pressed to respond to her client’s compliments about her kitna acha husband kitna caring… Much like the younger girl, Kuku too is learning the hard way ke koi apna nahin. Though surrounded by friends, a husband and a lover there is nobody actually willing to hear what she says. Everybody around her reads what they want in to her words. p11Initially she had placed her faith in Khurram, but he turned out to be a self-centered loser and user. He may seem like such a bechara, but even as he is baby baby-ing her, he never misses a chance to throw her weakness in her face – she had in fact enjoyed his nerdy sense of humor and found his brand of boyish charm amusing. No, Khurram is no Allah miyan ke gaaye. He is shrewd enough to know exactly which buttons to push when. I am very very bad but never unfaithful. Much like Laila’s saas, his eyes don’t miss much, but why should he upset the apple cart?  As long as he gets what he wants, why should he bother himself with what Kuku says, thinks or feels. As for unpaid bills and broken promises – not his headache! TV dekho popcorn khao aur mazey karo… baaqi sab mitti pao.

Kuku is not a fool, but much as she would like to rid herself of this useless-13 appendage she sees no choice but to put up with him. She needs the facade of a marriage in order to fix her second mistake – Mansoor. Another wrong choices of confidantes. She shared her problems with him and he conveniently read her confidences as a cry for help. Like a besotted fool, perhaps lulled by her confidence in her mazbooti and her daring to live life on her terms, Kuku compounded the first mistake by allowing herself to follow Mansoor’s lead. Later, she rationalized his marriage as his duty. She is not denying she’s still attracted to him, sharing chocolates, easily falling into familiar intimacies, but her minds tells her what her heart wants is not possible. A woman with principles, Kuku is trying her best to ignore her heartbreak and send him on his way. Sadly though mistakes are not as easily wiped clean as mirrors. What she does not know is that Mansoor is his father’s son. For him marriage is a mere social contract and the wife no more than a handy plaything. That a “liberal” woman like Kuku is unable to understand this as a given is a challenge to Mansoor’s manhood. How dare Kuku spurn him?

Bas Kuku thak gaya hoon main, enough! Main apne aur tumhare liye kuch nahin kar paya hoon. Nahin samjha saka main apni maa ko… haan main ek bohot hi kamzor insaan hoon… 

p15In a social set-up where patriarchy reigns supreme, Mansoor’s resort to these I-am-the-true-victim-here tactics indicate how down and dirty this man is willing to get. This is not about love. This in not about his relationship with Kuku. This now about his mardana ego. If he truly loved her he would not taunt her about her suicide attempt, neither would he conveniently forget the truth about Kuku’s marriage. That faint begining of a smirk on his face, when he sees the conflict on Kuku’s face, gives his game away. He will play with her weakness and toy with her. She is to be taught a lesson and what better way to diminish her than to reduce her to a sobbing hysterical caricature.What bigger insult for Kuku than to be described as the dreaded  mazloom other woman.  That phone call scene was BRILLIANT! How, just how could any man be so cruel?!?

Khair, Mansoor 10174946_10152883960668662_8424817188801043578_nmight’ve won this round, but the war has just begun.  He forgets who he  is dealing with. Kuku might have let her guard down and made mistakes, but she did not get labelled a mazboot aurat for no reason. He’s shocked her for now, but I don’t think she will allow him to toy with her this easily again. Laila too might’ve spent the night crying, but her refusal to accept the phone indicates this girl is not someone who will give in meekly. Her mother’s tarbiyat compelled her to go along with this accha rishta, but I suspect  it is her father’s influence that will show her the way out of this not-so-accha rishta. Mansoor might be his father’s son, but Laila is not his mother. Mansoor miyan, ab aap apni khair manayen! 

1505450_10152883960673662_2343811063196080669_nThat the whole episode was excellent goes without saying, but the phone call sequence was absolutely chilling. Sensitively written, fabulously directed, edited well, and magnificently acted, this was the scene of the episode, perhaps even the serial. Loved how Bee Gul and Khalid Ahmed built up to the moment, then came the shocker and gradually a return to the deceptive calm. So much was crushed and pulverized but not a sound. p9Sheer brilliance!

Iffat, Alishba, Sohail and Sumbul, all deserve a huge pat on the back for creating that stunning moment, the kind that haunts you for a very long time. Kudos as well to Fawad Khan for his very annoying Khurram. Naveed Malik’s cinematography is top notch. Lighting, scene compositions all are gelling together just so. Suffice it to say I am loving every minute of this ride. A Plus, the producers, writer, director, cast and crew all take a bow – this was yet another winner from Team Pehchan!

Written by SZ~

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70 replies

  1. Well I actually truly enjoyed this episode after nearly giving up on it. I think the portrayal of Mansoor is very realistic as many men think it ok to have a wife and the other woman, therefore it is spot on. I have spoken to men who say we have to marry ut is duty/faraz but not give the gf up. The issues being discussed are not your ordinary drama and very brave so I congratulate them for tackling it. The sad reality is we all probably know a Mansoor, Laila & Kuku.

    • @Salma: Yay! glad you enjoyed this one 🙂 This was a fab ep, and absolutely the entire team deserves a huge round of applause for daring to ask the diff questions and going against the tide of rampant commercialism. You are so right, these characters are very real and true to life, and unfortunately we can recognize so many of those around in these characters,
      Keep watching and I hope you’ll share the ride with us 🙂

      • Yes I did and I am glad Laila didn’t take the call as so far she is to egar to please Mansoor.

        I have never really watched many dramas with Iffat omar but have to say she is pretty amazing.

        • @Salma: I am not entirely sure, but I do know that Iffat took a few years off and recently returned to TV, Dont know if you watched it, but she was in Anjuman, the Imran Abbas and Sara Laren telfilm, and is now in Pehchan, Adhura Milan (also on APlus) and she has at least one more serial in the works that I know of.

          • I only watched her in a drama where she is married to saji hassan and he has an affair with mehwish hyat character and she gets divorced and the story from then on she was good in that.

            • @Salma – ahh yes!! i remeber that drama. Thori Si Wafa Chahiye, aired on GEO, That was her return after being AWOL for quite a while. She was really good in it.. The drama overall was pretty sad though. Hated Mehwish Hayat in it. Such a homewrecker. I dont remember much about it, but Iffat Omer def did stand out in her role of a single mother.
              The OST was good, sung by, I believe RFAK?

            • oh sorry! Didn’t see @Afia already mentioned the name! 🙂 do you remember the story?
              You liking pehchan?

  2. HI SZ brilliant review . Laila is so sweet and innocent . The beginning scene and the telephone scene was excellent , it gives me the chill. ( I was like ,are you kidding me ? what was he trying to prove? ) after seeing the episod I am thinking about why man are like that and in reality there so many like Mansoor and khurum . I think Laila will not tolerate Mansoor behavior , but right now she has no body to talk to . there are so many Laila! oh it make me sad? Bee Gul is so gifted and telneted that she can write this very delicate topic , talk about intimacy. Bravo Bee Gull and Khalid Ahmed. Iffat Omar , Alishba , soheil sameer ( handsome tall tan man) are wonderful they all so good . Mucho gracias !!!!! SZ loved your review so much !

    • @Ranjan: Thank you 🙂 Yes, as @Salma said, this serial addresses so many subjects never discussed in our serials, and as you say there are so many Lailas and Mansoors and Kukus and Khurrams around us. This reliability and realism of these characters and their issues is a huge reason why so many of us are tuning in week after week. Kudos indeed to the Pehchan team!

    • @Ranjan ur so right! The delicate subject of intimacy is handled so well! & good question: what was he trying to prove? he was pbbly showing hes the man!! But to be honest i think he wasnt trying to prove anything… He was just playing with his catch and having fun… And thats what makes it even more disturbing! Would love to hear what everyone else says abt this!

      • @Ranjan: excellent point indeed .. what does Mansoor gain out of this…@FA I am with you on this being a game which he is playing very deliberately, but on some level he is also trying to convince himself that he is indeed worthy of the “mazboot” title that is very generously bestowed on the male members of our social set-up. As you have astutely pointed out in your comment below, Mansoor is very very kamzor from the inside, and he knows that and that weakness scares him and so he over compensates by playing these games where he alone makes and breaks the rules. Again hats off to BG for highlighting the irony inherent in our social setup. Though a woman is seen as the sinf-e nazuk, kamzoor, bechari, and the man is mazboot etc the reality is quite the contrary. It is the women who are mazboot and the men who are kamzor. I think this will be highlighted in greater detail as we go along.

        • @SZ you are absolutely right women are stronger and they handle the situation better than men. I donot think he is soft inside otherwise he would not ask Laila to talk to Kuku.i think he is showing his Macho man side of him . I remember in qaide tanhai drama last episod savera is tell faysal that he is a man and he can tell his wife that he has girlfriend or his mother that I will marry and I won’t divorce savera.but his wife cannot give divorce or marry again to his friend.faysal can do this because he is a man .that whole conversation is so touching and at the end faysal agree with savera that. She is right. so here we go again , only man can do this women cannot .soceity main aisa rivaj ho gaya hai. After this I am analyzing man in my mind . When NUM was on we had discussion like this about M and W what is the relation between them and it was interesting .

          • @Ranjan: Oh yes, not soft, but weak definitely. Agree, we give in to easily to whatever the society designates as the norm, and going against what is socially agreed upon is seen as being headstrong, stubborn, willful etc. From the time we are children our roles are drummed in to our heads .. as women we are expected to behave in certain ways and men are similarly brought with frequent exhortations to “be a man,” “men dont cry,: etc .. So its not just men who behave in a certain way, we women too tend to play into our socially determined roles for the most part… Isnt it great that after a long while we have another drama that is giving us so much to reflect upon.

      • Totally agree with you @Ranjan that intimacy is shown so gracefully that you feel like yes that actually happens nothing over the top..
        I think too that he wasnt trying to prove anything just that he knows being a man he can do whatever and whenever he wants.. Other party hasnt a single right to go on its own.. He loves to make people dance on his moves…

  3. uuufffff what an episode!!!!!
    ok let me jump to the scene of the episode .. ive been itching to talk abt it.. honestly mere tou rongte khare the.. mansoor mian had been building up to this in this episode, but nothing could prepare me for this shock!! honestly my jaw dropped!, hand on my mouth!, i was frozen! unbelievable!!!!! @SZ and as i read ur review and came to the phone call i could feel the chill up my spine once again! honestly how good was that scene!! Alishba’s reaction.. hurt, pain, betrayal, confusion & shock! all at once.. Alishba was superb! And then Iffat’s reaction.. how she throws the phone.. the shock, the disgust, the creeps…& Mansoors insistance but how hes totally unphased, how hes crushing both the women at the same time..toying with them.. like a billi toying with her catch (two at a time in this case!) and then amma ko dekh ke he jumps back and hides back in his hole..(what a rat!! waise tou aur bohut si galiyan dene ka dil chah raha hai magar aap sab ka lehaz kar liya abhi!!)… And sumbul/amma going on abt bechara bachcha kitna kaam karta hai.. amma ji aap yeh dekhein kia kaam kia hai! … Honestly i havent felt like this in a long long time. This has gotta be one of the most chilling scenes ive ever scene.. like u said, no cheekhna dharna, no shor sharaba.. mere rongte phir se khare ho gaye hain!! kudos to all the actors, director the writer… i can go on and on abt this scene…
    @SZ thanks for bringing up the snow and petals.. didnt laila’s white and red dress remind u of that too?… infact id even say shaffaf umeedon ka khoon ho gya! her dressing was spot on!
    loved how u enveloped the subject and brought up how ‘a living breathing young girl is being systematically raped’.. thats sooo true.. its not just that moment but how she’s torn apart day by day..slowly and gradually.. even after that night she was happily talking away to mansoor’s picture.. but this call has crushed her.. bhook pyas sab khatam! …ooper se almiya… ‘How much how much does a shattered life matter to a people who pride themselves on preserving puraney magar mehnge baahar se aanaey waley bartan?’… all the ppl around her…
    kuku who had told mansoor clearly ke she cant be the other woman.. thori der main hi mansoor sahab makes her the other woman! how can kuku erase this? .. mere dimagh se hi nahin nikal raha abhi tou lol … and the salon scene! how good was that! iffat was fab! one could see her struggle, not just physically but emotionally.. how she wants to resist him and the thought of resisting him at the same time… zabardast! and zabardast was mansoor sameer too.. but ive got a bone to pick..bass agar angrezi zara kam bolein tou…hes a great actor but i just felt that his accent (english)) kills the scene at times..

    magar honestly kia namoona mila hai kuku ko! 8 baje ki dinner date bana ke uncle ji so gae.. ooper se jaan why r u cancelling the appts? i honestly thought ke aaj tou shayad kuch maraka mara hai jo itni khushi se ailan kia hai.. koi deal sheal sign ho gai hai.. but only maraka he mara-ed was getting ready, looking ‘handsome’ (apne munh mian mithoo), and then going out.. itni mehnat ke baad bechara was flat out before 8.. lol… bechari kuku ki tou kismat hi kharab hai!.. na chahte hue bhi she ended at her later date.. Abb khurrram sahab nay plate mein rakh ke mansoor ko pesh kar diya!…..aik nahin do do morons!! Cummon woman! u maybe donning ur louboutins but u are hopeless when it comes to ur taste in men!!!! lol

    The last scene.. jhoot!!! that startled me too! @SZ loved how u summed up the whole episode… sabb apne apne jhoot ke pardon mein hain.. and its an on going thing.. generation after generation!!.. how we can go on living a lie, and then start believing in it too.. loosing our pehchan..
    the saas bahu moment was very interesting.. the slip.. but the only advice she could dish out was charon qul… All i can say is, if thats to get rid of the evil tou shayad mansoor mian se hi nijaat mil jae!!!!

    Aur bohot kuch hai kehne ko.. it was such a happenning episode.. but for now all i can say i know last week i was trying hard to dig out the reasons to sympathize with these men, but this week i take it all back!!!

    • @FA: As promised jawabing you within 24 hours 🙂

      Was laughing as I was reading your comment… you do have a way with words!

      Sab se pehley tau I must say ke this episode was probably customized for you, ensuring that your sympathy ka bukhar utros as soon as possible … was this the man you were calling kamzor last week??? Maan!!! Agar Khurram’s head has a standing date with my hot frying pan, then Mansoor miyan ke liye meri karahi men tel garam ho raha hai…. Aaaarrrghhh!!! You are spot on with your cat and two mice analogy… kiya shaye hai ye?? And then after that brilliant scene the man has the temerity to talk smack abt Laila and the mirchis she has in her fingers? And then as if that was not enough he says accha hota agar saath khatey .. seriously?!?!? Like you, after watching Mansoor and Khurram in action, I too am acquiring quite a taste for French and developing an unhealthy interest in thinking up innovative ways to cause serous pain! Seriously though, that scene sheer brilliance, and the best part not one scream, no loud music, no zoom shots, no nothing – drama at its best!

      Great observation about white and red outfit in that scene. I was actually reminded of those red roses on the white snow-covered stairs, but sadly hamarey itney ziada masroof miyan Mansoor was in such a hurry ke woh becharey phool unki nazr-e karam ko taraste hi rahey… much like hamari Laila. Her friend told her shoharon ko taiyar biwiyan acchi lagti hain, but yahan to bechari ki saari taiyyari was forgotten by the wayside because of Mansoor ‘s drama. Honestly speaking, I’m still having a hard time getting over Mansoor. Sohail Sameer was great. LOL! yes his English pronunciations leave a lot to be desired but he is doing such a fab job with the slimy Mansoor ke ab it seems kinda mean to nitpick..

      Agree with your read on Kuku. But you know this is what i find so fabulous abt BG’s writing, ke no matter how down and low her female characters might be, they are never becharis. Laila would die before being viewed as a bechari. Kuku is much the same way. Laila’s mother is a daughter’s mother and is disparaged by her samdhan, but here again, she gives it back as good, if not better than, she gets it. Remember that classic, aap ki taste bohot acchi main aap ke saath shopping jaongi, scene from the last ep? And while I was feeling Kuku’s pain, like you I was thinking back to her Louboutins… Waqai great taste in clothing and accessories is no guarantee ke a person’s choice in men would be equally classy, Kya yaar Kuku.. bas yehi do sample reh gaye they? Iffat is AMAZING! Alishba too is excellent, but I think her role is a relatively simple one so far, but Kuku is such a diff character and somebody I would not want to know otherwise, but Iffat does such a great job ke Kuku becomes somebody very relatable and real. Too real at times.

      Waisey I was also thinking ke this salon business must be a great one, nahin? Itna ziyada kaam to lagta nahin hai,she doesn’t have many clients and plenty of time for gup shup with Mrs. Khan, but phir bhi there is money to pay rent and utilities, foot the bills for Khurram sahab’s business ventures, and still have enough left over for high end shoes and clothes… I think I am now inspired.. what do you say? Khol loon salon? Wonder if Kuku has any mashwaras she would like to share with me?

      Yes, happening episode indeed, but love how smoothly it flows and how deceptively slow it seems.. it was only after I started writing and had to edit out so much ke i realized ke itna kuch hogaya… Excellent excellent writing by BG and a superbly paced narration by Khalid Sb…

      • just lost my response again 😦 kher let me try again lol
        @ SZ ROFL@ sympathy ka bukhar and karahi with kholta tail: waise even last week i was just questioning why i didnt have any sympathy for him, but aaj ke baad meri tobah!! lol.. and good idea! my karahi is now on too lol
        re kamzor: see the man is calling himself kamzor lol… waise i still think he has a kamzor streak in him.. not the type that deserves any sympathy but the one that drives him to act in such a cowardly manner.. the guy who hides like a rat as soon as he sees his mum is def not mazboot.. someone who abuses his wife behind closed doors, and meets his lover chup chup ke isn’t strong.. yes he is manipulative and devilish but i would never compliment him as a ‘mazboot mard’.. he has a weak character!!
        re the dinner scene: yesss!! that pani dal dein and sath khana khate drove me bonkers! insensitivity ki intiha!! But did u see Alishbas expression here? like r u for real? someone who is still trying to digest what just happened moments ago.. and the clenching of her wrists.. her frustrations, anger, betrayal and helplessness… how powerful was that!
        re iffat and alishba: i think they r both fab.. Alishba’s role may not be as complicated a kuku, but i think she nailed some very complicated scenes.. to mirror all those emotions at all at once can’t be easy! but ur r right iffat is at her best here! on paper kuku isnt exactly an aam aurat next door, but to feel for her and turn her into a relatable character is pretty amazing!
        ROFL @ salon… hahahah haan lagta kuch aisa hi hai! i seriously need to reconsider my career lol Waise if she’s rolling in it she seriously needs to hire some help!! i mean an assistant could’ve cancelled the appointments…
        I missed mrs khan this week… i wonder what she would have to say now..
        which reminds me did anyone watch the precap this week? version i watched didnt have a precap…

        • @FA: responded to your mazloom Mansoor observation above, but I am also now thinking ke how narrowly we use these defns, mazboot mazloom etc .. My first ep review also asked the same question, but in the context of women, but as you point out, and very rightly so, these questions are equally applicable for the men around us, but in the obverse. If we question why a woman with tears is alwats called kamzor, mazloom etc, why do we not ask these questions of the men, why are they always seen as the ones with agency,,, and here I wonder if we are being asked to reconsider this question of agency: Do we all start off from the same point and then somewhere along the way, perhaps due to social conditioning, women start handing over their agency to men, making them the karta dharta of their lives, thus putting themselves in a submissive position and the main in the dominating one? This is of course a huge oversimplification and there are and will always be variations from the norm. But dont you think it is worth talking about how much we buy into these labels. Almost all our analyses takes these stereotypes as given and take these as the departure point, rather than bring into question these stereotypes themselves.. For nstance we begin with an assumption that a man has agency and is mazboot, why dont we question, as we are now, whether the man is in effect inherently mazboot…. what do you think? Or rather what do you all think … would love to read all your takes on this ….

          • @FA-SZ: interesting v.interesting topic to talk on.. I dont know whether i will make sense or not but to me …its so natural phenomena that everybody has this set theory in their mind that Mard ko dard nh hota.. They are strong and better have dominating authority and if not people start calling chamcha, ghulam or a baby.. I have seen so many mard hazrat in my family who just cant be dominating or lead.. And thats ok too.. Har koi ek jaisa nh hota but then its same me when i see their wives leading or making decisions i am like wah ye acha he.. Which ofcourse i shouldnt be thinking like that… We normally praise a woman who has very strong will power and equally very control in her decisions but when a man cries his heart out, or shows some weakness.. Foran se we say Mard bano Mard.. Why dont give man a benefit of doubt like u said previously treat them as Individual too..
            This thinking of treating everyone as individuals wont come easily and if some one tries to bring.. Ppl wont get it sadly ..

            • @Rehmat: Enjoyed reading your very thoughtful comment, and you are spot on! These gendered stereotypes are very much a part and parcel of our lives and we accept them without any questioning or giving them a second thought, and of course the more we buy into them more they seem like a given. And you are absolutely right, these stereotypes are so pervasive that it seems like they will never change, but I tend to think that with more education, more exposure to different cultures and ideas and conversations like this do offer us a chance to rethink. If we stop to think about these then perhaps we will be a bit more careful in our usage and that where we become agents of change. Many of us here are married, what if we stopped using these kinds of -ve reinforcements when talking to our kids. Even small things like not differentiating b/w sons and daughters or using language like “boys will be boys” or “boys dont cry” or “girls dont play boy games” or “girls should know how to cook,” or making shaadi the be all and end of all of a girl’s life, will go a long way in rectifying these stereotypes.

          • @SZ @Rehmat totally with u guys..we are responsible for these stereotypes and in-turn strengthening the stereotype mard.. its a vicious cycle..
            It pbbly makes no sense but but heres another aspect to consider… what about those who say dekho aurat itni mazboot hai sub kuch seh jati hai.. (most of the time char aansoo baha ke magar khamoshi se lol)..she can endure anything!.. i mean the aurat in our dramas who goes through ordeal after ordeal.. (rona dhona or not).. if she can endure all the zamane ka sitam only then she is a mazboot aurat..
            Why does an aurat have to prove her strength through her endurance whereas for mard, he has his force, agency and authority…?

            • @FA: absolutely… my sentiments exactly .. I was thinking along similar lines when I questioned our stereotyping of mazboot vs mazloom,,,, and what you bring up is yet another aspect to that same issue …our heroine has to suffer physically and emotionally for 26 weeks and it is only in the 27/28th episode that we deem her worthy of wearing the mazboot aurat ka badge (remember Umama in Dagh?)and so yes def as a culture we do have double standards and what is sauce for the goose is no sauce for the gander .. ..what is very troubling that our media is playing a huge, not to mention a very active, role in perpetuating and solidifying these stereotypes …

        • @FA: Yes! that dinner scene and AY’s expressions were excellent! That eyebrow lift was worth a thousand words. Again, sheer brilliance!
          The vdo below has the precap … Laila.. uff! she breaks my heart .. us Mansoor ke liye to karahi bohot choti paregi… Im gonna go buy a vat I think .

        • @FA: totally agree with you and yes even i felt in dinning table scene .. He was like as if that moment of phone didnt came between them.. Was so chilled out.. Pani barh ke dain WTH dil karaha tha pani mun per uchal dun.. He is such a Leecher..

  4. Salaams SZ, great review. The episode was really boring. I loved the first episode the most since it showed the whole journey of one of the most important characters- Kuku- in a single episode and that too, the first episode. Also, what’s great about Pechaan is that emotions and some characters are deeply explored in addition to some significant dialogues and scenes. However, the story has nothing new to offer, it’s just displayed in a new way. The story is simply a love triangle that is shown in countless dramas but what’s new here is that we’re just seeing a deeper exploration of characters such as Laila, Mrs. Khan and Kuku. It’s really annoying to see how Laila is being ill-treated by Mansoor and hopefully she firmly gives him a talk about her getting the respect she deserves. It’s tiring to see Kuku still keep up with Khurram. Atleast for now, although there are meaningful scenes and dialogues, the story has nothing new to offer.

    • Wasalam Aisha. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment even if you didnt really care much for the ep. True, the deeper exploration of characters and an insight into their inner struggles is what sets Pehchan apart, Yes, I too would like Laila and Kuku to take a firm stand against Mansoor, and i suspect we will see that happening sometime soon.

  5. okay what exactly happened in the opening scene? did the writer suggest that mansoor tried to get all frisky with the wifey and she was dead asleep?

    • @Sonia: In a nutshell yes… remember he had no time for her at the end of the last ep, and so when he came to bed she was already asleep hence “unavailable,” and though we weren’t shown it, I am guessing she probably rejected his advances saying she was tired, hence his annoyance, And thats where she gets up to apologize, because she thinks its her duty as his wife to please him and do his bidding.

      Didn’t realize you were following this one… why dont you join in? Would love to read your take on this one 🙂

  6. Another thought which struck me as I was going through these comments was how respectful and adoring Mansoor is towards his mother. Now compare this with how different he is when he is around the other two women, Kuku and Laila, None of them get the gentleness he displays towards his mother. On the other hand we have Laila and her dad, she adores he father and I dont think she ever thinks of her dad as her mother’s husband. I dont think she’s ever asked her mother about her marital life. I guess we never see our parents as individuals in their own right, just as parents. And its not just Laila, her mother too talks so fondly of her father, again for her too he father is the ideal man. In a way this reminded me of DeS where Shandana has always seen her father as the ideal man, never as a man, like her husband. Would love to hear what everybody else has to say on this …

    Again, love how subtly but effectively BG has put our entire web of relationships under the microscope here. Mothers, fathers, mothers-in-law, husbands, wives, girlfriends, friends, nobody seems to have escaped her eagle eye…

    • Salaams SZ, are u seeing Rung on Hum Sitaray, it comes every Saturday. It stars Imran Aslam, a newcomer actress in the lead and more. Just saw the third episode and loved it. I finally got to see Imran Aslam in a more mature and fitting role after some time. (It was so annoying to see his boring character in Rukhsaar, he was wasted:(
      However, the story is fresh with a nice pace, do see it.

    • @SZ: your thought even made me think too.. And this is so true talking about myself .. I too used to see my baba as just a loving father.. It was then after so much time i started seeing him as a husband, as a son and as a brother and it was like there are different personalities to him (no he has no multiple personality disorder LOL)..

      You are so right that we rarely see our parents as individuals, how much they had to bear or suffer to come on this stage.. In these relationships we easily forget individualities.. Thank you so much for sharing and yes hats off to BeeGul for these small yet powerful thoughts to ponder on

      • @Rehmat: Haina! I love how Pehchan is making us think and rethink so much we take for granted. Truly entertainment with food for thought!

    • @SZ yes defo.. and i feel again it comes down to our perceptions and those half lies & half truths that create that perception..
      Its very interesting that u brought up DeS…i was thinking abt it last week, but in a slightly different context….
      As for our parents’ perceptions, i think, again, its goes back to those lies, and half truths u initially mentioned.. remember how SP (nano) didnt want Shandana to discuss her husband and their marital problems in front of the bachchi..(sorry i have forgotten all the names)… How Shandana only became aware of the past when it was literally spelt out to her…
      We as parents try and shield our children from the bitterness, and sourness of that particular aspect of marital life, and rightly so.. and that is what makes them idealize us as parents when they only get to see the picture perfect / happier side of family life… and i guess because of this shielding we somehow only see them as a parent and not an individual..
      On the other hand, we hear things like children from broken families suffer like x, y, z.. and thats why many ppl do go through unhappy marriages just for the sake of their children..carrying on shielding/hiding/living-half -truths…. but until the day that problem gets out of hand and it can no longer be brushed under the carpet the child is, supposedly, in a healthier environment..
      i guess Mansoor has heard all the ‘my father was a hunk and all the girls were after him’ stories, but he pbbly aslo got to see the other side of his father too… and when that persona shattered, perhaps it left some scars on mian mansoor too.. he pbbly respects his mum for shielding him from it, but at the same time wants to avenge the world in his own way, (or maybe in his father’s ways lol).. ok here i am, back on my mumkinat trail again!!! lol.. and thats a tell-tell sign to say im making no sense whatsoever lol

      • @FA: true …. but I do wonder if we do our children disservice, particularly as they grow older … and especially in situations where marriages are arranged and young, immature girls are sent to strangers’ homes (in Pehchan) or situations where pampered protected girls get married without ever getting a reality check that would prepare them for how different a marital life is as compared to living with your parents ..Im not saying parents should be fighting or exchanged words in front of their children, but as they grow up I think there has to come a time when you dont necessarily need to dig up the past or rake up unhappy memories, but at least initiate a conversation. Again, probably an idealistic notion, but worth thinking about, especially for girls .. if they are deemed old enough to get married then surely they are mature enough to process some of their parents’ hard learned wisdom. The burden is ofcourse on the parents here as to how they choose to have this convo … but DeS seemed to have no problems dissing her hubby in front of her daughter … why wait his long? Is there are certain age when it is okay to diss your spouse in front of your children? And on DeS, not trying to open up a can of worms but talking generally, I do wonder that even when a woman claims that things have changed after all those years of zulm and qurbani, does she ever really forget and forgive? And how hypocritical is that? And if that is hypocrisy then our all the mazboot aurats in our society hypocrites? Do they ever really move on from their mazloompana?

        Re: Miyan Mansoor I dont think he is on an avenging mission .. more likely living up to the ideal of his charming popular father. I have a couple of friends who are from feudal backgrounds and married into them as well.. and I have to tell you no matter how educated and intelligent and worldly wise they are in all other matters, when it comes to men they have a very blase attitude about men being men and mard ki shaan and gandi aurtein throwing themselves on our hubbies …and Mansoor’s mom is a representative of that kind of thinking .. I have a feeling that she might have felt betrayed by her hubby, but now that she is mother of a grown son, she has pushed away those feelings of humiliation and thrives on praising her “shareef but handsome beta jis ke peeche khandaan ki larkiyan pari rehti hain …”

        LOL! Now I’m rambling and making no sense but khair hai .. as it is its just the two of us here 😉

        • @SZ yes, i wanted to say all of that in my prev comment magar apni mumkinat parh ke mein khud hi darr gai ke i was wayyyy off-track lol
          sharing wisdom with the children : now thats a catch 22 situation.. u tell ’em u r doomed, u dont tell ’em u r doomed..lol.. and how far can one go in disclosing the truth.. to be honest i’d much rather have that perfect persona of my parents than a flawed one!! call me whatever but i truly cherish it!
          As for DeS abb kia bolein.. she hadn’t forgiven or forgotten! didnt u see the two single beds? lol…waise i know an old couple like them who have lived all their lives but in burhapa the lady cant take it any more.. they have two single beds.. she tells all the horror stories from her jawani..mian sahab just like Qawi, and lailas dad.. everyone likes him, bar the wife.. but the difference here is that the children take the horror stories with a pinch of salt… their stance is itna bardasht karr liya tou iss age mein, when they need each other the most, why all the shikwas and dramas?! … sad state of affairs to be honest….
          yes def hypocritical.. DeS did drop her tanzia lines every now and then… goes to show the hypocrisy.. and same is the case with mansoors mum and lailas dad… both hypocritical in their own way.. mansoors mum knows abt her husbands and her sons karname but she carries on as if they were doddh ke dhule hunky mards..
          lailas mum does warn her from time to time.. bringing up her in-laws, and stories.. to some extent, she does try to bring her closer to reality..she wants to know what’s going on in Lailas susral.. wahan ki kher khabar.. its not just for gossip-sake but for the reality-check… but is it enough?…Laila’s dad, however, is far from it… hes loving and caring but disconnected.. and perhaps its this disconnection that the aulad prefer up to a cirtain point…or until they find the connection in their own lives…. i know i used to ignore my mums naseehats abt susral and susral mein kia karo gi-s.. but i got much closer to her after i got married and started paying attention to her stories and experience..

          re mansoor: haan yeh bhi hai! like i said i was on my mimkinat tip.. u know how wild my tukkas can get in that zone lol
          pata nahin kia kia likha hai..rambling needs to stop! time to call it a day.. baki kal!

          • @SZ and FA: bit late though but was so chaeing to share and comment on DeS… I enjoyed watching that drama mainly because i was in lala land that time and was excited to see how shehwar listens to her dad’s naseehats and bring change… Other perspectives it didnt matter to me comparatively.. Abhi recently i just had random thought of how shahwar’s MIL wanted almost all her jehaz to be gifted to her nand…. Ab i think tou find it v,unreal .. Why to give such qurbanies which u tend to remember always and become hurtful… About her telling all this to Shandana.. According to me its necessary to tell kids about how and what parents went through because then it helps alot to understand them and even learn from their experience specially after marriage.. My mom told me her stories and to some extent they were just stories that time but it was after my marriage they were so helpful to me.. Didnt wanted to do same mistakes she did and she still encourages me in not becoming a goat of sacrifice… So i think it depends in what way u dont forget… About forgive tou i actually agree with you both k jab sab badal chuka tha then why still carrying so much luggage..

            Im sorry.. Khudaya have no idea wht i have written 😀

            • @Rehmat: LOL @ chah-ing to comment – too cute!
              thank you for sharing your personal experience and you raise a very important point, which I think sums up our discussion well: “it depends in what way u dont forget” … so its not about using our life experiences to negatively influence children, rather to use these judiciously to help make life easier for the next generation/our children ..

            • @Rehmat : LOL @ laala land…ye mere sath bhi kai baar hoa hai …aur bilkul thik kaha k parents ko chahiay k start hi say bachon ko prepare kerna shuru kren lekin is baat per mera apni sisters k sath bhi ikhtilaaf ho jata hai jaisa SZ nay bhi kaha k bohut log sochtay hain is say bachon per bura aser parhay gaa ..oon kaa zehun kharab ho gaa…oon kaa bachpan khatum ho jye gaa etc (DeS to shandana)…jab barhay ho jyn gay tab bta den gay lekin her guzertay din k sath oon ki personality ban rahi hai aur ager aap wait kertay rahay k acha 18-20 years k hon gay phir btyn gay tou bohut cases mein main nay yebhi dekha hai k wo bachay believe hi nahi kertay yaa khud parents ko question kernay lagtay hain

              bilkul aap ki mom ki tra meri mom nay bhi hum sisters ko hamesha in courage kia k stupid qism k sacrifices /compromises kernay ki koi zaroorat nahi hai…”it depends in what way u dont forget”…wow beautiful 🙂 …
              shehwaar nay pehlay kiun nahi btaya…I think wo bachon k dil main apnay baap k liay koi nafrat nahi paida kerna chahti thi aur jab “halaat” itnay naa guzeer ho gai k bty bina chara naa tha tab os nay shundana say share kia lekin nateeja tou ye hi nikla…jo cheez mujhay buri lagi k end main oos nay itnay saalonmain apnay hubby k achay aur changed behavior per koi baat nahi ki aur naa hi shundana ko mana kia k apnay father k liay koi buri baat naa sochay wo bura phase tha so guzer gaya…I mean oos ko koi problem nahi thi k sundana kaa relation apnay baap say khraab ho jye sirf oos ki mom ki waja say…jub k father k role main wo thik hi nahi ideal tha

              saaf baat hai shehwaar nay oos ko maaf nahi kia..phir oos ko btaya tha k main nay sari baat shundana ko bta di hai shayed nahi….apni position clear kernay kaa mouqa tou deti..pta nahi bahi kia tha mujhay tou samajh nahi is drama ki..ye hi keh ker jaan churha laity hoon

      • @FA: very interesting points 🙂 ..ji pehlay wala k parents apnay bachon say apni life k bitter experiences kiun chupatay hain is kaa jawab main day dia aap ki baat bhi thik hai isi tra hum oon idealize kerat hain kiunk oon ki personalty ki weaknesses humaray samnay nahi hotin aur hum oon ko individuals k tor per nahi dekhtay lekin jaisa main ay kaha k humaray parents bhi humein oon k “bachon” k role main hi dekh ker ye faisla kerat hain k hum oon k bachay oon k liay kia sochein lekin as a person/human being hum kis tra shape up ho rahay hain is per un ki nazer nahi hoti tou is process kaa start humaray parents hi kertay hain

        bilkul sahi half truths/half lies…parents bachon k samnay cheezon ko oos tra rakhtay hain jis tra wo oon ko dekhna chahtay hain ye nahi haqeeqat main wo cheezein kaisi hain?…

        jahan tak mansoor ki baat hai..mera nahi khayal is banday main is qism ko koi soch yaa zameer ho gaa k apni mom k sacrifices kaa khayal ker k oos ko respect etc kray ager aisa hota tou phir wo apni life main mojood dosri aurton kaa bhi khayal rakhta…I thin yahan bhi parents kaa hi role important hai ..ek tou manssor k father jin hon nay is sub ko jaiz banaya mansoor ki nazron main kiunk wo khud ye kaam ker rahay thay tou kaisay oos k dimagh main ye daltay k ye ghalat hai…dosray mother jo husband ki attension naa lay sakin poori life…ab betay ko kul jahan samajh lia hai aur oos ki up-bringing main ye shamil hai k meri maan k baad koi nahi etc etc…ab yahan bhi dono parents mansoor ko apnay betay k tor per dekh rahay hain aur jo cheez on ko suit ker rahi hai oos k hisaab say oos ki up-bringing ho rahi hai is sub main mansoor ek insaan/merd/ferd k tor per completely nazer andaaz ho gaya hai jis kaa khumyaza kukoo aur laila even oos k bachay ko bhi bhugatna parhay gaa…obviously ye selfish approach hai lekin yun hi tou nahi kaha jata k bachay bhi ek tra ki investment hain jo aah invest karo gay kal wo hi pao gay

        ye hi selfishness ab mansoor main bhi nazer ati hai k oosay apnay ilawa kisi kaa khayal nahi….laila oos ki biwi hai jo samajh jye gi… ek insaan nahi jis ko takleef ho gi..tou ye cycle chalta rehta hai

    • @SZ: interesting point 🙂 ..lekin hamesha ki tra mera mamlaa ulta hai is liay main nay apnay parents ko as individuals bhi bohut ziada analyze kia hai kiunk mere khayal main ek insaan ko samajhnay k liay zaroori hai k oos ki personality k her aspect ko dekha jye …waisay bhi her insaan k past kaa aser oos k present phir future per hota hai ..ek merd jaisa beta ho gaa oos kaa kuch naa kuch aser oos k husband yaa phir father k role main zaroor ho gaa isi tra aurat jaisi beti ho gi..wife aur mom k roles main oos ki jhalak aye gi..tou mere khayal say main nay apnay parents specially father ki bohut si aaton ko isi tra samjha hai..ab ager main nay aap ki baat ko sahi samjha hai 🙂

      • @RJ: Apologies if I was unclear … I was writing as I was thinking so probably wasnt making much sense, but I was referring in more general terms to younger girls, in particular, like Laila, jinki abhi parhai khatam bhi nahin hoti ke they are married off into families they barely know.. ab aisey mein these girls hardly have the time to understand themselves forget about analyzing their parents. Is liye as @Rehmat suggested ke parents should share selective experiences with their girls in order to better prepare them for the life ahead, or if not then, then definitely after marriage .. I dont see the wisdom in waiting for as long as DeS did … woh jo kehtey hain na ke whats the point of closing the stable door after the horse has bolted …
        And you are right that we have our basic personality traits which do not change as we transition from one role to other .. but toi understand this one has to be at a certain level of maturity… there will be exceptions but I find 18-22 yr olds quite self-absorbed and busy in their own universe

        • @SZ: bohut achay main nay itna lamba comment type ker k ghalti say oosi tab ko close ker dia 😦 ..kher main keh rahi thi k aap unclear nahi thin lekin jo discussion hoi oos main itnay ziada aur itnay valid points raise hoay k mere liay sub per baat kerna possible nahi tha kiunk main kafi late ho gai thi is liay ek point jo mujhay important laga oos per baat ki thi lekin aaj dil chah raha tha mazeed bolnay kaa LOL dosray aap ki baat ko deeply aur detail main dekhnay per kuch cheezein mere samnay ayn wo kuch yun thin

          1-bilkul aap kaa kehna thik hai k ye parents ki responsibility hai k wo apnay bachon ko educate kren aur anay walay challenges k liay prepare kren lekin ek tou shuru say hi is cheez ko apnay bachon ki up bringing kaa hissa banyn aur oon ko ek insaan k tor per is qabil banyn k wo apni life main anay walay challenges kaa sana ker sakein..matlab sara zor rishton say ziada oon k character building per hona chahiay

          2-kiunk her insaan ki life doosray say different hoti hai oos ko different situations ko face kerna perhta hai is main time factor bhi important hai..meri naani ki life aur experiences mere kuch khaas kaam nahi aa saktay isi tra mujh say baad anay wali generations k problems aur hon gay…tou ager terbiyut insaan ko strong/ descion making ability /problems ko face ker k oon say apnay tor per nikalnay ki ability humaray ander ho gi tou hum easily kisi bhi kisi qism k halaat kaa samna ker aktay hain

          3-problem ye hai k ager hum apnay parents ko as individuals dekhnay ki bjaiy sirf parents k tor per dekhtay hain tou wo bhi humein different relations k hawalay say hi dekhtay hain..nai?…matlab beti hai tou ideal beti honay per sara zor..phir wife…phr mom..isi tra betay…kia humaray parents humein ek lerhki ek ferd ek insaan k tor per dekh ker treat kertay hain is kaa jawab mujhay aap say chahiay kiunk main confused hoon

          4-phir sirf lerhki ko educate kerna hai kiunk oos nay kisi stranger k paas jaa ker rehna hai aur beta oos nay bhi tou kisi stranger lehki ko apnay paas laa ker rakhna hai kia oos ko proper guidance ki zaroorat nahi …aur humaray kitnay dramas main ye hotay dikhaya gaya aurton ko tou her koi samjha raha hai wo bhi jo khud aurtain hain…DeS kaa sub say barha failure ye hi tha…mujhay dekhna tha k shehwaar nay apnay betay ki up-bringing kaisay ki..kia wo bhi ek aur mansoor /haider tha? kuink shehwaar ki soch k mutabiq merd ko gher banana nahi ata ye tou aurat kaa kaam hai…ager aisa hi tha tou mere liay shewaar ek failure case thi jo itna suffer ker k bhi society ko ek positive/ strong/ apni responsibilities ko samajh ker aurat ko braber derja denay wala merd tak naa day saki..bus saari nasihut shundana k liay thi?

          5-ye situation mere liay depressing honay say ziada disappointing hai phir change kia aya?…saari taleem shaoor k baad bhi problems ko tou aurat merd k basic personality traits ki bunyaad per hi solve hona hai…jo kaam aaj say 30-40 years pehlay humari moms/aunts ker rahi thin aaj itni education /independent/ itna exposure honay k ba-wajood bhi hum nay waisay hi sacrifices kernay hai..kisi zulm ziadti k khilaaf koi awaz uthaiy bina bus gher banana ki dhun main aur autrat honay k zoum main sub berdasht kerna hai…zulm kia hai? physical verbal abuse aur jo haider kerta raha shundana k sath jo insulting behavior tha wo zulm nahi tha…kisi nay bhi oos ko nahi samjhaya..tou phir parents kaa itna paisa berbaad kiun kerna hai ager itni barhi barhi degrees k sath wo saari jahalut bhi sath sath carry kerni hai tou kia faida is sub kaa?…taleem sirf achi job safe future tak mehdood ho gai..pta nahi at least main tou saaf saaf apnay bhaiya ko kehti hoon k kuch baton main tumhein apnat father /uncles say different hona hai werna koi faida nahi

          6-ye hi yahan ho raha hai mansoor ki mom ay apni life main is cheez ki waja say suffer kia wo hi mansoor ker raha hai mager aunty ko koi perwaah nahi..laila ko chorhein oon k apnay betay ki life khraab ho rahi hai oos k liay oos ko samjhyn..

          7-last point is qism ki guidance kaa bhi ek time hota hai jaisa main nay pehlay kaha k shuru say terbiyut kren…ye nahi k shadi ho gai yaa koi aur problem ser per aa gai tou phir hosh aya..jaisa DeS main hoa….kiunk main nay tou ye hi dekha hai k jub ek baar aap ki personality bun chuki hoti hai phir aap apnay ander chaah ker bhi koi change nahi laa saktay…ye jadoo raaton raat nahi ho sakta ye sirf dramas ki baat hai k ek dum say u-turm lay ker kuch aur ban gai bhala jo lerhki 20 years tak gaye ban ker rahi wo ab achanak tarzan kaisay ban jye gi…is main time lagay gaa aur ab wo apnay experience say hi seekhay gi ia waqt dosron k mashwaray kisi kaam k nahi

          ab pta nahi kahan say kahan chali gai..ye comment khonay kaa reaction tha 🙂

  7. Pehchaan is getting amazingly interesting week by week and to make it more enjoyable are your reviews.. How beautifully you explain and uncover the hidden meanings 🙂 thoroughly enjoyed Pehchaan on screen and its meaning on paper..

    The starting scene made my mouth all wide open that this guy is such a third class… And then during whole episode he continued making my faith strong that he is indeed dirty.. Dono larkiyun ko nacha k rakha hua he.. The way laila cried and apologised to him.. It felt as master and slave relation.. She lying on his feet and giving explanations.. How disturbing… What makes Laila a true character is that she forgets all bad things her husband does to her and only remembers the way he appreciates or talks nicely to her.. Like the next morning.. He only praises color she was wearing but the way he praised was enough to make her blush all day and talking to his pictures..

    I liked how mansoor’s mother said about shikal and surat but Laila was so lost in her imaginary world that she didnt picked and focused on what and how important she missed.. Following that the call she made to mansoor and she says sorry was saddening..

    Coming to Kuku.. Trying as much as possible to ignore Mansoor.. She actually follows Mrs Khan’s advise k let me do what i want to do.. And goes to meet him…what i find interesting is even then she has frustrations with her… She cant really decide as to how make him go away and stay content or to live with him as other woman which obviously woman like Kuku will never ever think about it.. Still trying to get along with Bad Khurram, cancels all her appointments and in return she gets to hear k jaan tumhe depression he.. Ahhhh how annoying he could be.. No limit i guess..

    I was happy to see Laila all deck up she looked beauty.. My happiness went into thrilling mode.. When mansoor asks her to talk to his friend and oh bouy i was freezed k like seriously.. The way alishba was looking at him with shocked and full of questions expressions and he be so unbothered person forcing her to talk.. At the same time Iffat was bang on.. Though she was in different frame as compare to those 3… But what an impact she made.. I was glad laila didn’t talked… But as you rightly said SZ it went so calm after his mother came in picture.. Either its Toofan k aane se pehli ki khamooshi or the toofan that just turned that moment uske baad ki khamoshi..

    Loving this so muchhhh…

    • @Rehmat: “It felt as master and slave relation..” wah! what a perfect description of that lovely lovely opening scene! Tussi chha gaaye thaa kar ke!

      Re: Kuku’s meeting Mansoor as a way of following her heart, as per Mrs. Khan’s advice, hmm…. you could be right, Idk it seemed more to me like she was going to ignore it and go with Khurram, but bhaijan loser .. and then he turns around and says why are you canceling your apts??!! Arrgghhh!!! Ab aisey main Kuku was def not going to say ke I was stupid enough to believe you so to spite him and save her ego she says Im going out and then goes on to meet Mansoor … again my take .. if anybody else has another reading would love to hear it ..

      “Toofan k aane se pehli ki khamooshi or the toofan that just turned that moment uske baad ki khamoshi..” Perfect way to describe the ending ,, girl, you are on a hot streak with these comments! Glad to know its not just me but you as well getting swept away in the magic of Pehchan 🙂

  8. Guys, check out this explosive promo of the 7th ep! Seems like explosions are gonna happen, but ever so subtly and silently, Pehchan style! 🙂

    • @SZ i was a bit disappointed with precap u shared earlier, with Laila going on as if nothing has happeneed.. but this one is explosive!! Wow! I wonder why they didnt show this precap with the episode!!??!!

      • @FA and @Rehmat: Explosive indeed!!! Waisey apni Kuku bhi kya cheez hai … Laila ko Mrs Khan ki behen bana kar ghar bheje gi tau Mansoor ka tau dimagh ghoom jayega…wouldn’t that be a perfect revenge for him insulting her the way he did in the last ep? And then Laila could add more mirch to the masala by introducing miyan Mansoor to an old college buddy … LOL! Im writing my own story here, but seriously that precap is perfect for inspiring mumkinats!!!

        • @SZ: nahi nahi meri kukoo ini zalim nahi hai 😉 ..wo laila k baalon k sath aisa waisa kuch nahi kray gi bulk yahan tou wo mamla ho gaa “main apnay haath say oos ki dulhan sajaaon gi” LOL ..dekh lejiay gaa ye hi ho gaa ..ab ye meri story hai 😉 ..aur plz be-chari kukoo k naam k spelling decide ker lain ye third time change hoay hain 😛 ..problem ye hai aap k sath sath main bhi change kiay jaa rahi hoon 🙂

          • @RJ: Jo hoga so dekha jayega . ab shughal karne mein kya harj hai? :p And LOL mere khayal mein meri spelling tau consistent hi hai .. might be a typo here or there … baqi ab aap loag sab apni marzi se decided kar saktey hai … waisey yeh to sirf ek fictional character hai… aap note kijeya ga Vasay Ch ke naam ki kitni spellings hain.. har jagah ek nayee variation. Infact at one point I was so confused ke I actually asked him if this was deliberate and he was going the Ekta Kapoor way, experimenting with various permutations!

  9. @Afia and @Ash: Thanks for the info abt Thori Si Wafa … the name doesn’t ring a bell..will try to catch it and see what its all about.

    • @SZ: ji ye wo hi drama hai jis k baray mein main nay shuk thread per btaya tha ager aap ko yaad ho…yasir Nawaz is k director thay jis kaa end public poll k baad change hoa tha detail wahan hai…kafi emotional /melodramatic type hai…check ker lain per mujhay nahi lagta baat banay gi…ab ager main prediction kerna chahoon tou 🙂

  10. chalein main bhi kuch hissa daloon 🙂 …pehlay review per baat ho jye ..well is episode ko dekhtay hi mujhay bohut shidat say aap k review kaa intezaar tha is liay nahi k mujhay epi main kuch confusing laga apnay caliber k hisaab say main nay oos ko poori tra samjha lekin main dekhna chahti thi aap is ko kis tra perceive ker k humaray samnay present kerti hain..reason sub jantay hain abhi kuch comments dekhay aap kafi detail main is issue ko discuss ker chukay hain lekin review jo starting point hai her qism ki debate kaa aur jo drama image ko shape deta hai viewers /readers k minds main…aap k nazdeek wo shape kia hai? …aur kis hud tak aap successful hotin hain is ko as it is hum tak pohun-chanay main yaa believe kerwanay main..yaa ye bhi ho sakta hai aap safe play kertay yaa kisi awkward situation ko avoid kernay ki gerz say review main is per baat hi naa kren aur yaa bold/mature honay k chaker main itni ziada baat ho jye k baqi tamaam issues sideline ho jyn aur ye fact hai k humaray haan jab ek baar intimacy jaisa issue raise ker dia jye tou saari debate oos k gird ghoomti rehti hai reason bohut interesting hai k hum ek conservative aur “mashriki” mentality rakhnay wali society say belong kertay hain jahan culture kaa hissa hai k openly in issues ko address naa kia jye aur ager kia jye tou disliking show kernay k chaker main hum is per ziada detail main baat ker jatay hain 🙂 ..tou is cheez main balance rakhna k baat bhi ho lekin itni maturely is ko handle kerna k ye sub ek limit main rahay sath hi dosray issues ko bhi nazer andaaz naa kia jye bohur difficult hai

    phir is k 2 level thay ..drama ki sutaah per team Pehchaan ki jitni bhi tareef ki jye kam hai..jitni brilliantly sensitively aur subtly inhon nay is issue ko handle kia hai oos k liay words nahi hain mere paas….werna akelay dekhnay k ba-wajood main akser romantic scenes dekhtay hoay bhi uncomfortable hotin hoon kiunk jab aesthetically ek cheez aap ko appeal nahi ker rahi visually sound honay ki tou baat hi naa kren mujhay lagta hai aisay issues k haalay say abhi humaray drama makers bohut immature hain aur isi waja say viewers bhi….lekin pehchaan nay ye initiative lia hai aur bohut saray aisay issues ko ek naye lekin mature andaaz main viewers k samnay pesh kia hai…main writer aur director ko salute kerna chahoon gi

    doosra level ziada dangerous hai k dekhnay wala kis tra oos ko perceive kerta hai ..kai baar dekha ek achay drama ko mishandle kia gaya aur khaam khaa oos ko controversial bana dia gaya tou is main reviewer per bohut ziada responsibility ati hai after all itnay logon ki mehnat paisa time etc kaa sawal hai aap k gher zimay daari say oon sab kaa nuqsaan ho sakta hai…ye wo tamam khudshaat mere dil main is epi k baad say thay kiunk ab mujhay nazer aa raha tha k baat kis terf jaa sakti hai aur Pehchaan start say hi mera bohut fav drama ban chukka hai main nahi chahti is k sath is qism ki koi ziadti ho.. tuo main nay kaha haan bhai ab ho gaa SZ kaa sahi imtehaan (obviously jo main apnay tor per lay rahi thi 🙂 aur imtehaan kaa sun ker ghabryn nahi “ye tou chalti hai tujhay ooncha urhanay k liay” after all hum apna best aisi hi situations main datay hain 🙂 …review aya main nay perha aur main bta nahi sakti mujhay kitna fakher hoa 🙂 …. ji haan khushi say ziada fakher aur aap janti hain khushi say ziada fakher sirf apnon per hota hai aur ek baar phir confirmation ho gai k ager SZ meri most fav reviewer hain tou bilkul wo deserve bhi kerti hain ..ye seat paki paki aap ki hai bhai

    epi per thori der main aur FA SZ plz yaar kuch hath hola rakho mere itnay say comment type kertay kertay 40 say 48 comments ho gaye…. mujh nanhi jaan per rheum karo LOL …actually main mer rahi hoon k jaldi say apna comment likhoon aur phir dekhoon k kia “baat” ho rahi hai itnay zor o shor say 🙂

    • @RJ: Thank you 🙂 I’m glad I passed an exam I didnt even know I was taking LOL! 😉 Magar ab khali tareef se kya hoga? Mera medal?? 😦

      LOL! Kiya kya jaaye … Yeah saari discussion @FA ke pichley hafte hafte wali humdardi ka nateeja hai hahaha! No but seriously @Ranjan, @Salma , @Rehmat and @FA all have brought such fabulous points to bear ke discussion , aur woh bhi zor shor wali, tau banti hai boss .. Bus ab aap bhi utar aayen maidan mein 😀

      • @SZ thank you so much I didnot realize that, I was afraid to write openly about intimacy. somebody might take it in a negative way, as our culture is different and raise in a different way so I was hesitate but thank you SZ. Education and the environment always make different in thinking and than putting in practice, but chalo abhi bohat keh diya .i enjoy everybody comment and learning a lot so thank you all.

    • @RJ i was thinking abt u ke kahan gain RJ iss hafte! missed ur detailed analysis this week..Chalein kal ki ep se pehle pehle share karr lein.. we r missing ur danishmandana comments in our garma garam convo.. lol
      totally with u on tackling such a delicate issue.. poore exam board ne pass karr diya! lol

      • @FA: That’s very kind of you 🙂 …aap nay yaad kia main tou is main khush ho gai …danishmandana keh ker sherminda naa kren lekin ye such hai k abhi kuch din pehlay hi main apni ek friend say keh rahi thi k SZ k reviews ko understand /discuss kernay k liay jis intellectual caliber ki zaroorat hai wo mujh main tou nahi …lekin kuch commenters main hai phir aap kaa naam lia k FA jaisay aur bhi commenters honay chahiay kiun samjhnay k ilawa apnay POV ko bayyan kernay kaa huner bhi aap k paas hai 🙂 …LOL @ board nay paas ker dia …SZ ji balle bhai balle 😀

  11. @Ranjan: I totally get it that it is hard to talk about subjects which are deemed taboo in our social set-up but I do believe that its past time that we broke away from the past and started discussing these issues, albeit in a mature way. Given the complicated times e live in I think we owe it to our childreb to talk to them and teach them about these matters, and we can do so successfully only if we ourselves know how to approach and deal with these issues … and as @RJ rightly pointed out this is where Team Pehchan has taken a bold step forward, but in a very responsible and subtle way, and initiated a conversation, Now the onus is on us to educate ourselves and others by engaging in meaningful, but respectful and restrained, discussions. And you my friend, and everbody else all raised fab issues that made all of us think and reflect on so much we take for granted .. so thank you for participating :
    Did you check out the promo link I posted for tom’s ep? Seems like its gonna be a hot one! Looking forward to hearing more from you .. and please dont hesitate to share your thoughts/questions 🙂

    • SZ you won’t believe it but at least twice in day I read the comments and waiting for new comments to read . I enjoy it so much . I saw the promo and I can’t wait for tomorrow and also for your review . Can I ask you ? Where do you live? I hope you donot mind . as teacher I have learn so much about this topic and how to approch it to the children . The children are so smart they surprise you,I also talk with my sons we have a healthy discussion . And really it helps . I hope I am not boring you talking about me . Thanks .

      • @Ranjan: No, not all.. its always good to hear from you 🙂 I am in MA in the US..
        Missing your take on this latest ep 🙂

  12. LOL… aap bohut sweet hain aur mera dil bohut kum logon say baat ker k yaa oon ki baat sun ker khush hota hai aur aap definitely oon main shamil hain 🙂 ..hmm jahan tak medal ki baat hai tou main ye hi keh sakti hoon “kia pesh kren tum ko kia cheez humari hai ” bhai dimagh aap per aap k ufkaar-o-khayalaat kaa ghalba hai aur dil aap ki pasandeedgi k nerghay main…tou humaray paas ab apna kia hai jo aap ki khidmat main pesh kren …aap hi bta dejiay 😀

    jaisa sub nay kaha starting aur ending scenes hi most crucial aur turning points thay is epi k ..again difference between laila and kukoo bohut hi brilliantly show kia gaya…lekin ye difference characters say ziada situation ki base per tha..ek newly wed girl and a mature married woman…at least main is ko aisay hi dekhoon gi …ab again is ek scene main itna kuch hai k….lekin main detail say comments dekh ker phir is baat karoon gi ager kuch add kernay laiq hoa

    ek baat clear hai first scene wali laila last scene main nahi thi jo sudden growth nazer aye is character main..i loved it…I am glad laila nay expensive jewllary kaprhon aur dosri cheezon ko oos love aur affection per terjee nahi di jo ek as a wife oos kaa right hai ye hi waja hai in sub k hotay bhi wo constantly khud say question ker rahi hai….now kukoo I think wo sincerely move on kerna chahti hai lekin is k liay oos ko jis support aur help ki zaroorat hai wo oos k paas nahi khurram main itna mature yaa character wise itna strong nahi jis ki help lay ker kukoo khud ko is daldul say bahir nikalay

    I think wo sara din struggle kerti rahi kis tra faraar hasil ki jye manssor k paas janay yaa even janay k khayal say …mirror cleaning scene say clear ho jata hai aur khurram k kehnay k baad k hum dinner per jyn gay wo saari appointments cancel kerti hai again is baat ki nishaani k wo at least koshish ker rahi hai mansoor say door janay ki …ab khurram hi kisi kaam kaa naa niklay tou kia kren…main ye kehna chahti hoon by nature kukoo unfaithful nahi hai bulk baaz dafa insaan halaat kaa shikaar ho ker kuch aisa kernay per majboor ho jata hai jo oos ko oos k muqam say gira deta hai… sadly jis jo rokna hai wo bilkul opposite kam ker raha hai …khurram khud yahan full force say kukoo ko push ker raha hai mansoor ki terf

    phir sincere/faithful hona kia hai? is per bhi baat kernay ki zaroorat hai….husband wife ek dosray k ilawa oos relation say bhi faithful hon…apni responsibilities poori kren ek dosray ko understand kernay ki koshish kren ek dosray k liay sacrifice kren….Pehchaan nay is epi main humaray society main mojood shadi k concept per bohut say sawal uthaiy hain …aur shadi jo ek particular issue say juri hoi hai shadi ko ek process samjha jata hai k ab ye phir ye aur phir ye..ek robotic mechanical process … pehchaan nay shadi ko is concept say azad kernay ki koshish ki hai…

    khurram aur kukoo kaa rishta bhi co-dependency ki misaal hai..mujhay nahi lagta khurram ko waqai kukoo say mohabat hai..wo ek living parasite ki tra hai jis ko maloom hai k ager main is host say alug hoa tou mera apna wajood khutray main perh jye gaa …isi liay oos nay kabhi kukoo ki oos emotional psychological needs ko poora kernay ki koshish tou ek terf oos k baray main sochnay ki bhi zaroorat mehsoos nahi ki…young hai immature hai…bhai kitna?..kia laila say bhi young hai wo bhi tou apnay tor per samajh rahi hai apnay husband ko…lekin ager aap ki niyyat hi nahi tou koi kia ker sakta hai…ab kia khurram ko maloom hai kukoo aur mansoor k baray main…shayed haan….aur ager ye sahi hai tou phir main khurram ko jo kehna chahti hoon wo yahan nahi keh sakti

    aur wo friend …ager behter actress laitay tou wo scenes kafi enjoy kiay jaa saktay thay..lekin mera dhiyaan tou oos ki acting per hi raha 😦 …aur ye hi sochti rahi yeeee laila ki friend hai? yaqeen kerna mushkil tha..kafi mushkil

    ab kukoo aur mansoor…is epi nay in k previous present aur future relation per bhi roshini daali hai…in k relation ki noiyut kia thi.. I think ye dono ek dosray say mohabat kertay thay kafi understanding bhi thi ye sirf ek extra marital affair nahi keh sktay…naa hi kukoo koi aisi aurat jo is qism ki cheezon k liay sirf ek merd say milti rahay..ye clear ho gaya kiunk kukoo kaa sub kuch chrh ker oos k paas ana hi proof hai k wo mansoor k sath ba-qaida ek relation main jana chahti thi..manssor kukoo aur apni maan k agay kamzor lekin laila k agay full control main rehna chahta hai..again ye humari society k merdon ki speciality hai jo bohut achi tra show ki gai aur sath hi mansoor kaa doghla pan k shayed khurram ki tra oos ki bhi niyat nahi thi yaa shayed do aurton wala concept mansoor jaisay merdon kaa banaya hoa hai jis per naa unhain shermindi hai na pachtawa…

    lekin kukoo tou ye nahi chahti…problem ye hai k mansoor ki shadi aur kukoo k patch-up k baad ab in relation ki noiyut bilkul change ho gai hai…ab is main mohabat k ilawa sub kuch hai…aur naa chahtay bhi kukoo mansoor ki life main dosri aurat hi hai …jis k liay humarai zubaan main kuch achay lafz nahi…is kaa ahsaas kukoo ko hai bhi aur nahi bhi

    mansoor nay ek baar phir apnay cards achi tra khelay pehlay bhi oos nay kukoo ko realize kerwaya k wo khurram k sath khush nahi is liay wo oos ki help kray gaa ye nahi kaha k main tum say mohabat kerta hoon is liay tumhein is museebat say nikaaloon gaa ab phir kukoo ko realize kerwaya k tum mere bina nahi reh sakti..is liay is relation ko aisay hi calnay do…phir time kis cheez kaa lia hai pta nahi..pehlay kon saa teer maar lia ab kia kray gaa bus jhootay dilasay

    ufff last scene…mujhay kuch nahi kehna oos per..mera blood pressure high ho jye gaa phir mujhay abhi sona bhi hai…ok ab khatum ek short break k baad comments aur oon per apni rai 🙂

  13. ok main nay comments perh liay hain aur mujhay ziada thik laga k jo discussion hoi hai oos main say jin points per main baat kerna chahti hoon oon sab ko ek jaga likh doon…lekin FA /Rehmat /Ranjan /Salma (sorry ager kisi kaa naam bhool gai) main nay aap sub k comments bohut enjoy kiay aur sath hi jo meaningful discussion generate hoi bohat kuch seekhnay ko mila..aap sub kaa be-hud shukria 🙂

    1-Ranjan’s point: mansoor kia chahta hai…shayed main nay is per apnay comment main baat nahi ki is liay …I think ye bhi humari society ki reflection hai jis main shadi say pehlay hi dono sides per ye baat dimagh main daalna shuru ho jati hai k jatay hi bus dosray ko dominate kerna shuru ker do baad main bhi dekha jata hai kis kaa hold ziada hai…mansoor first night sy hi jo kuch ker raha hai laila k sath aur wo oos ko tolerate say ziada understand kernay ki koshish ker rahi hai ..is sub nay mansoor miyaan k hoslay kafi berha diay hain ab oos ko lagta hai wo kuch bhi ker sakta hai..opening scene main laila ki apology /begging aur phir next morning manssor kaa cheesy andaz k jaisay raat koi unpleasant cheez nahi hoi even laila laa blush kerna…bohut kuch samjhata hai k kis nay “surrender” kia?…is say pta chalta hai k mansoor k khayal main laila relation nibhanay k chaker main her cheez berdasht kray gi

    dosri baat ye ek tra say laila ko oos ki jaga batanay ki bhi koshish hai yaa anay walay waqt main jo honay wala hai oos ki preparation..ek teer say do shikaar ek terf laila ko snub ker raha hai dosri terf kukoo ko batanay ki koshish k dekho main tumhari kitni care kerta hoon aur kisi cheez say khouf zada hoay bina even apni wife k samnay bhi tumhara ziker ker k tumhari apni life main haisiyut manwa sakta hoon..lekin mansoor kaa sub say bara problem ye hai oos nay laila even kukoo ko bhi understand kernay ki koshish nahi ki ..ye hi waja hai dono kaa reaction oos ki merzi k mutabiq nahi aya…tou mere khayal main ye apni life ko in aurton k sath bina kisi takleef yaa resistance k guzarnay k liay ek koshish thi…baqi wo azboot hai yaa nahi…ye sub ko even oos ko khud bhi pta hai k wo kamzor hai lekin is kamzori kaa aitraaf bhi wo cleverly sirf wahan kerna chahta hai jahan oos kaa faida hai aur jahan mazboot yaa dominating bun ker ullo seedha ho wahan oos tra bun jao..

    ye baat bhi hai k humari society k merd sari dunya k samnay mazloom bun ker rahein gay..khaas tor per dosri aurat k samnay lekin wife k samnay kuch bhi ho jye kisi qism ki weakness show nahi kerni..ye oon ki ego kaa problem hai aur pehchaan k sub characters bohut real hain isi liay hum oon main interested bhi hain

  14. I started watching Pehchaan after reading the praises for it in the comments on other reviews here. So far, it is living up to the praise.

    The review is as good as Pehchaan; it explored facets of the story that I hadn’t considered. Kudos for that! The comments on the thread further add to the enjoyment of this thought provoking story.

    I’ll post a relatively short comment for now as I can’t do justice to the richness of the content in the short time that I have right now. The subtlety with which potentially controversial issues are handled is peerless. It is also subversive in many ways; even the characters we end up feeling for aren’t the ones we would have felt for if we had heard of the story in real life. I feel sympathy for Kuku, an adulteress, and revulsion for her husband: Khurram. The sad truth is that many of us have known people who despite being smart and successful, have made lousy choices in the realm of love.

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